From an LA County Jail: The Holiness of an Imperfect Life

From Producer/Director, Rhonda Moskowitz

I received the following from a rabbi who works as a prison chaplain in the Los Angeles County Jails. The rabbi sent something profound and unique written by a prisoner, as a comment to my blog. What this prisoner has to say is too powerful to be buried in the ‘Comments’ section. Here it is, unedited:

“May 4, 2009

The following drash was written by one of the men I worked intensively with during his incarceration at Men’s Central Jail. He has been sober and studying and learning as he prepares for his eventual release. We are both very hopeful that this will be the end of this chapter in Dylan’s life and that, indeed, the holiness and hope that he has been experiencing will be just the beginning for him of the life, however imperfect it may be, that he can have. A holy and sober life.

Rabbi Yossi Carron
Rabbi Chaplain, Los Angeles County Jails
California State Prison, Corcoran

“MATZAH”
A drash from Dylan L., delivered at seder inside the Los Angeles County jails

Matzah is the bread of affliction, but this year it became for me the symbol of the disease of addiction.

Matzah is flat, plain and simple. Our first bite of matzah at the seder is a bit of a shock. Darn right, it’s the bread of affliction, you think. After that first bite we cover it up with charoset, dip, anything we can to make it taste like something! Iver the days of pesach we get rather creative with it: sandwiches, matzah brie, salsa, charoset.

This is what we do to ourselves in the disease of addiction. We take that first bite of an imperfect life and we just don’t like it. But, like matzah on pesach, it’s all we’re permitted to have, So we cover it up—with alcohol, drugs, sex, gambling. No matter what we slather it with though, underneath it is still the matzah of that imperfect life.

It takes the burden of addiction and the blessings of recovery, enslavement and freedom to understand that the plain, flat, simple piece of matzah, like the imperfect life we once tried to cover up with our addiction, is truly holy.”

Blog #2 From a Jew in Jail

From Producer/Director, Rhonda Moskowitz

As I’ve previously written, I’m recovering from a badly broken right arm and subsequent surgery. While I’m on the mend, it’s still hard to type. I’m just now catching up on the writings from the county jail of one of the TESHUVA film’s main characters, an extraordinary young man named Philip, (Hebrew name, Fivel). I wrote to him to feel free to send me blogs to post.

The following is the second blog Phil sent me, dated January 31, 2009, from the county jail.

“Fivel’s Blog #2:

Hello faithful listeners, loyal subscribers, and the pit-stoppers. Shalom. I hope that spirits are high and the love of freedom is not taken for granted. Things can change drastically, very quickly. This entry comes from Central Booking, Pinellas County Jail, Florida. Unfortunately, this won’t be my last one.

First, my health is good and my faith is unwavering. Actually, maturing everyday… Knowledge and maturity are two very different things — especially in reference to Judaism.

My knowledge of Hebrew, holidays, traditions, prayers, blessings, etc. are vast and deep. But until now, I hadn’t really had a grasp of what I knew. To know things is good, but to understand and be able to interpret what you know, so you can fully utilize your potential, well that’s extremely wonderful.

Take caution not to succumb to lip-service prayer. Be truly devoted. And it’s easy enough when you take time to divulge all the spectacular pieces of religious wonders within the Torah.

These things are what’s important: The corners of the field, attending the sick, dowering the bride, the first fruits, early attendance at the school house, accompanying the deceased to the grave, devotion in prayer.

But the study of Torah exceeds them all. Incorporate the Torah, Talmud and all related subjects into daily life and you’re guaranteed not to slip.

Shalom Alechem, blessings to all the Children of Israel, my family, my son, Elijah, and my director (amongst other things), Rhonda.

Love,
Fivel Ben Avraham
(Philip Son of Abraham)”